Synthetic Ego

Another one bites the dust...

Another big weekend. And what a show! What a fuking show!

The biggest line up of compeditors in my division I had ever seen,
ever. The quality and conditioning of these athletes was amazing.
Everyone I talked to in the audience said it was the most compeditive
lineup seen in quite some time.
I didn't place in but I was happy with how I looked. I came in tight
and hard, I came in harder then in the previous week but it still wasn't
enough to keep up with these guys.

The vascularity and dryness of these guys was simply breathtaking, we
all had such a great time hanging out backstage and getting ready to go
on and perform for the crowd knowing that in this group, nomatter where
we placed it was a deserved spot.

By the time my posing routine had come around I had seen the pictures
taken from the crowd of the pre judging and talked to a few mates of
mine who are all experienced bodybuilders and I knew Id come in 4th or 5th
so the pressure to win was pretty much off... The top three had won a
postition on the diece, which position was still up in the air...it
would be a close battle.

But the great thing about not having a chance, is that you don't have
to care.... and thats the best way to go into your posing routine. When
the only reason your onstage is to entertain and showoff, you're going
to put on a show!

And my routine went off.... Oh damn I had fun. I had the girls in the
crowd screaming and on their feet. 60 seconds of pure exhileration and
pride.
Just think, Frankie Goes to Hollywood... ;-P

Next week is the big finale to this season. The sydney comp is huge
and attracts the best of the best. For me, competing there is a glimps
into how the real men play the game and its a great experience. My only
chance of winning is if I win a lucky door prize of protein suppliments
or something... so again, no pressure. Just gotta go in there looking
my best, looking better then last week and better then last year.
Because when it comes down to it, thats all I really wanted from this year,
to be better then last.
And now that Im competing with a waist that measures less then 28 1/2"
Im happy.

So this weekend is about celebrating my sport and basking in the
process, enjoying the show of it, the eternal preperation and the display.
The few chances in life where its not a bad thing to stand up and say
"Fuck I look good. Check THIS out!"
Im really looking forward to this weekend. Its been a very, very long
road. Its been a very full on three weeks of competing and Im looing
forward to being able to open my focus onto other things and other goals
in my life. Im looking forward to being social with my work collegues
and going out clubbing on the Rainbow Mile, in my Emerald city. (If
its still there? Last time I heard the whole strip was slipping into a
social wasteland....)

Im looking forward to having more flexability in my life, re-connecting
with friends and regaining balance. But one thing I do know is that Im
going to miss it. Im going to miss the deadline, the pressure and the
pain.

Its a good thing I've already got the path to National compititions
mapped out.... because THATs going to be a challenge. And if I haven't
learnt anything else from this I have learnt that I like the challenge.
The harder it gets, the more I love it!

posted by NarcissusAU @ 11:20 PM