Sunday, July 30, 2006

Dance rules at the Disco...


Some Friendly looking guys at DTPM (Picture sourced from Chrisgeary.com)


Things to remember when Dancing in a nightclub (near me):

1. If your on the dance floor, dance. Bopping from one foot the other does not count.

2. If you smile at me I will smile back, Im friendly…this does not mean you should then proceed to grope me.

3. If your wearing a hat in a night club your hiding something. That’s all I will say.

4. If the dancefloor is not full and the first dance move you make involves stepping on my foot then you are too close.

5. Just because you repeatedly bump into me in drug induced dance ‘style’ does not mean I’m trying to pick you up.

6. If your are the same age as my father, and with the same stellar physique (please sense major sarcasm here) do not see it as your right to fondle or feel me up.

7. Don’t just stand there and stare, I can feel you looking and its really off putting.

8. If you’re hot, try and break away from your group on the dancefloor so I can try pick you up. It’s scary trying to approach a group, but Id still like to jump you.

9. If you take anything onto the dancefloor other then your ‘groove’ you will loose all respect. This includes cigarettes and glasses with drinks in it. (Oh you mean carrying this full beverage above my head through a mass of gyrating people didn’t stop this bright red liquid spilling on everyone??)

10. Smile. Its not hard, its even meant to be fun…but remember rule number 2.

11. If the beat drops on a track and Im going off and getting down with the tune…that is not the right time to come over put your hand on my shoulder to introduce yourself and deliver a bad pickup line. Ur just ruining the best part of the song.

12. If you ask me a question I will answer it nicely and in a friendly way, because I am friendly and nice. Not because I want to sleep with you, dance with you or have your hands feel up my chest.

13. If you do find the right time to ask a question, do not use it as an excuse to run your hands all over my torso. That’s just rude. (And obvious)

(Guess who went out this weekend and found nothing/noone interesting or sexy??)

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Things to say...

1. The first thing I have to say is the I handed in my notice at work. This is so exciting and such a big change in my life! Because of my high level position in the company I had to give notice of my intention to resign. Which I did at a board meeting yesterday. I have to keep that notice confidential to board level until my official resignation goes in at the end of August.

So I am absolutly dying inside because I want to scream from the roof tops that Im moving on and starting new experiences. Everyone thought that I was going to stay with this company for the rest of my life, especially the way the treat me and how quickly I raised through the ranks to start running the joint.

But I need to move on and its the most exciting thing!! I can't wait till I get to tender my resignation date and I can start telling my friends and everyone about my travel plans and all the big plans about to start in my life.
Im sure this is boring to you all and you just want me to talk about some more sexy scenes with hot guys but Im so glad I can vent about this here.


2. Something very exciting happened to me today. Im supper chuffed and feeling really egoed and pumped up for right now. Manhunt rejected my picture as being fake!! How exciting!!

This is the message they sent me after I sent in my picture for posting online:
["Dear Narc,

As a full access member you are not required to post a picture on your
profile.
But if you choose to upload a photo, we ask that the picture be of you.

Please feel free to contact customer service at: 1-866-424-9999

Thank You,
Dave"]
They then deleted my picture and left me with none on my profile. Thats so cool.

3. NO FUCKING SEX. No playtime, no messing about, no sweat and no FUN! Fuck I need to have some fun and need to make some bad boy mess with a big buff naughty MAN!
I'll have to see what I can do when I go out to go for a hunt this weekend..... Watch this space, Im gonna get you guys something to read.

Monday, July 24, 2006

That's so Gay...


Just quick word on what may end up being the funniest thing I’ve ever overheard. Sitting in a burger joint chowing down on some chicken wraps, and two guys walk in. They are together in that “together” kind of way… they look up at the menu board and start making their decision…. Its hard, there are some great options at this place, and all really healthy and low fat(ish). Suddenly dude 1 turns to dude 2 and asks: “how many calories do you think I swallowed today?” Aha, okay…counting calories that’s cool…not usual for a burger joint- no matter how healthy. But then the second guy turns and answers: “I don’t know, but when Marco started cuming I thought you were going to drown!” Group laughter all round, hahahaha…
For me, I nearly chocked on my chicken stifling back the waves of laughter.

That’s so Gay!

Friday, July 21, 2006

Dear God....

Dear God,

Firstly, let me say congrats on that whole 6 days of creation thing, if your ever looking for a job in project management I’ll always have an opening for you.
But unfortunately my letter to you today is less then glowing. I have a complaint to make in regards to some of the smaller details of your whole creationist plan.

Firstly, I have an issue with your “Grass is always greener” policy. Under this draconian plan we all have to listen to the women of the world complain that all the successful, cute and nice guys are gay. And whilst I am successful, cute and nice and gay, I don’t believe this to be the standard for my kind. Adding salt to this wound is knowing (as a gay guy) that the majority of the hot, sexy and head turning guys are in fact straight and not even a tinsy bit bi-curious. To me that’s just plain cruel.

Secondly, I’d like to ask for a rethink on your Ego allocations. Why is it that you give the confidence to the guys that really shouldn’t have it?? It always seems to be the guys who are the least fit, least attractive and least appealing to be the first to take their shirts off when working hard on construction sites. It is these guys who always do the nudie run (when the whole nudie run idea would be far more entertaining if carried out by a big, muscular man). And it’s always the least attractive guys that wear their Speedos to the beach whilst the hot guys wear the big baggy dork shorts. It just doesn’t seem right.

Finally, I need to ask that you cease and desist with that cruel joke you’re playing on us all when you allocate calories. The whole world would be a much nicer place if there were less fat people. So why do you load all the calories into the foods that taste the best? Why do I have to ignore the chocolate iced Krispy Kreme with sprinkles if I want to maintain a six pack? Surely this doesn’t make sense?? Krispy Kremes come in a six pack….so why shouldn’t I get one from eating one?? Same goes for a six-pack of beer.
It just seems a little back to front.

Now Ill let you go, I know you’ve got a lot on with the whole global warming thing. I mean it’s a nice try to get all the good looking dudes to take their shirts off for me…but seriously aren’t there better ways?

Regards,

Narcissus

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

Insight into the true New York...


I saw this news story on NineMSN today and thought it was rather cool. You see it seems somebody has put together a collection of letters written to the Mayor's office of the great city of New York. Letters of complaint.

I just love the idea that these letters go back to a period predating the civilisation of my whole country.... I mean there was some dude in America demanding compo from New York City before some other dude had even said "You know what? Lets call this grassy bit with the harbour 'Sydney'". (And to add to my humour the first letter in the collection, from 1751, is a compensation claim...how American is THAT!)

Anyway, if anyone in New York happens to get more info on this....There is one interested Aussie over here who would like a bit more info...

Saturday, July 15, 2006

The second meeting...

So remember Euro dude? He was the feature item for a weekend in the city a couple of weeks ago. This was the first time I'd actually re-met a guy Id played with in a spa, but only this second meeting was in the Golds Gym.

Whats a dude to do? What was the etiquette in such a situation? After I saw him the first time working accross the room at the squat racks I thought: "I know this guy from somewhere..." then on the second glance I remembered where from...

And yes it took me two looks before I remembered who he was... Its not that I fuck em and throw em...its just that these guys tend to look different with clothes on (and not lying on their back, ankles to ears)

So the third time we catch each others eyes and I smile, just to let him know I've recognised him. But a happy "Oh...Gday mate....fancy seeing you here..." kinda smile rather then a "Im gonna make you scream later..." kinda smile just to set the boundries.

I was paranoid about making the guy think that I was ignoring him on purpose, which I was not. I would really hate for someone Id fuked so hard and so long to think I was giving them the cold shoulder...because that really would be cold!

Monday, July 10, 2006

Now its time to share...

I said I would and fellow Blogger Darien asked for em so here they are....my pics from onstage at my competition. I am super impressed and so proud of what I achieved and how I looked on the night...

I turned out all right on the night, the tan was great and nice and super shiny. The funny thing is when I was off stage I was bright orange, kinda like the Oumpa Lumpas in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.


My legs turned out to be the biggest on the stage, and despite the lack of definition and separation a couple of people remarked on how good my legs were. They were huge by the way.... they looked great. Wahoo....
You'll have to excuse the secretness (and yes, I know thats not a real word! Hehehe) of hiding the face.... but I don't want these appearing everywhere.

Perhaps Ill post more later.... I think I'll prepare some more for general public exhibition.

Monday, July 03, 2006

Naughty but Nice European makes anal conversion (Part 2)

Continued from Naughty but Nice European makes anal conversion ...

There he is, walking through the corridors checking out the dudes and heading straight for me. I like to stand near the porn theatre so when Im waiting for stuff to happen at least I can watch the porn….But it also gives you something to look at so you don’t end up just staring at someone. So this guy makes his way into the porn theatre and takes a seat. I glance at him sideways and he looks back at me, I go back to looking at the porn on the screen and so does he. I make the decision in my head that this guy is going to be my mark for the night I glance back towards him and cock my eyebrow in my “come and get it” kinda way… add in a wicked grin and a nod in the general direction of the darkness where only the noises of man on man flesh action could be heard. (That and the sound of that insistent thumping thumping of trance that you only hear in sex clubs…funny that)
Anyway, he grins and starts the walk towards a room where we can get going with the sweaty stuff….I follow behind and smile.

We get into the room and I grab for the light switch, these guys always turn the lights down…damn it, I wanna see what Im playing with!! This guy has spent hours doing ab crunches alone and he want to fuk in darkness so I can’t see them?!? Seems a little misguided to me….
Anyway, down goes the towel and I start running my hands over his shoulders and smooth chest, down his abs he is just delicious.
He runs his hands around my torso and down my back grabbing the back on my towl and ripping it off my body. Naked at last!
He kisses my neck and moves down my chest and nibbles my nipples…. Hell yeah. I pull away and start to pay with his rosy nubs. He groans and rolls his head back and grumbles slowly, oh I think that was a hot spot.
Not a word had been spoken up to this point and I leaned in to ask him just how ruff he would let me go…I need to set boundaries cause I can tend to get too ruff for most guys real quick. I ask how hard he likes his nipples worked…he leans back in on me, into my ear and whispers in a dis-jointed, heavily accented way: “ you…can do…whatever…you like. Stop…Ill make you…if I don’t like….now your…nice fun” Then he grins and as he sinks down to devour my nipples again as he flicks and nipples on them. The great news being that as I get older my nipples are becoming more and more sensitive.
He works them over some more then I push him off and we continue….

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